• Jose Luis Ucar

Expected Surprises

Are we allowing surprises to take over our lives? 

According to google, surprises are unexpected events. So, what if we could expect surprises and act differently when they happen? How would that make our lives better?

I’m quite a curious guy, continuously looking for ways to improve and do things differently. I believe there is always a better way, but I haven’t always been like this. Let me explain what I mean by this.

One day, not long ago, I was driving my previous car, a black BMW which I liked a lot. I know what you might be thinking, yes, a BMW driver. Suddenly a guy cut me off and I literally went ballistic, started shouting at him and almost jumped off the car to fight. Very common thing to do where I’m from if you want to show how tough you are. Yes, I certainly fit the BMW driver profile. Don’t I?

On a different occasion, this has nothing to do with driving :-)

My Fiancé, bought me a ticket to go to a wonderful national park in Colombia. I can’t describe how good I felt. I was very grateful, excited and very much looking forward to getting a nice tanned and swimming in the Caribbean Sea. It was winter in the UK, so you can imagine where I’m coming from. Happy days.

Then another day, I turned up to work and my Boss told me she wanted to have a word with me. Hmmm, I could imagine what was going to happen. Can you? Yes, I got made redundant and you know what the worse part was? I was again being overpowered by emotions. Emotions generated by unexpected events, yes, surprises.

This is when I finally realised I was living in an emotional roller coaster and it was at that point, when I made the conscious decision to begin looking out for surprises, and act instead of reacting to them.

For example, last Friday, I took the day off to enjoy it with my Fiancé, run some errands and prepare a few bit and pieces for the wedding, because we are getting married (Exciting, right?). The day was well planned in advance. On days like these, I usually like cooking breakfast, so I got started and as I was half way through the process, it suddenly happened…The microwave broke down with part of our breakfast inside and the door wouldn’t open. What may look as a silly inconvenient today, in the past it would’ve turned into chaos, changing my mood and hence spoiling the rest of my day, yes, I can be a drama queen sometimes. However, this time, I was proud that I mainly acted instead of reacting to the surprise. In the end my Fiancé got involved and helped me getting the food out.

In the past, my inner voice would have gone, Jose Luis, alerta, alerta, se acaba el mundo ¿qué vas a hacer? It basically means in Spanish; the world is coming to an end. Now my approach in completely different and with time, practise and training, I’ve developed a counter dialogue that calms my inner voice down by saying, anything can happen at any given time. It’s called life.

So, what are you going to do next time, when surprises come your way? What if, you could act differently and therefore change your life?

Keep up the great progress as you continue finding your excellence to become remarkable at what you love doing. 

All the best,

Jose Luis Ucar

Excellence Coach at Finding Excellence

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